Wednesday, November 28, 2007

So many questions...

1) Are you having any cravings?
They're more like fleeting fancies. One day I really wanted red beans and rice from Popeyes. Another day I wanted spaghetti and sauce (but not with the homemade sauce I made because I'm sick of those damned tomatoes we got from the farmshare.) Popeyes was delicious as always. The spaghetti from the place down the street from us was a serious disappointment. One night I really wanted Chinese food, another day Beef Teriyaki. Unfortunately, I can't indulge these fancies as they hit because that involves money and time to get them, and we can't afford to satisfy all my whims. Now I make do with Hebrew National Beef salami sandwiches, Coco Krispies, and fruit.

2) Is it a boy or a girl? Are you gonna find out?
I don't know what it is yet, and yes we are going to find out. The ultrasound is Dec 12. Keep in mind, this is not 100% accurate, and it may decide not to be in a position where the technician can see its genitals. Once we find out, I will miss calling it "it." I realize that sounds cruel and heartless, but it's a sadistic joy of mine. Considering what I will have to go through during labor, give me this.

3) Do you have any names picked out?
My husband and I would like to have some part of this pregancy just for us, so we will go through the naming process as a couple. You'll meet the little person, name and all, when you see it. Thanks for respecting our decision.

4) Are you showing?
I'm small, and the women on the job have been saying for a while now that I am showing. I certainly can't hide it, but I'm not very big. My bellybutton is starting to pop out, and I'm getting that line down my stomach.

5) Are you feeling anything yet?
I think I am. Very quick movements, and they usually don't repeat themselves. It's not enough for you to reach out and lay your hands on my stomach expecting to get nudged. You'd be waiting a long time.

6) How are you feeling?
Overall about the pregnancy? I'm being overtaken by this alien that has made me feel like crap for months. My back hurts, I can't sleep comfortably, and you ask how I'm feeling?

Pregnancy gets romanticized waaay too often, ladies and gentleman. I'm not here to spin fairy tales for ya. The truth is I feel strange. My body is no longer mine. But I chose this, so I live with it. I'm not resentful. I don't hate the baby and I don't blame my husband for doing this to me. I just don't consider this the most rapturous thing to have happened. I'll be more excited when this part is over.

7) Are you shopping? What can we get you?
My least favorite questions. I come from a superstitious family, so I'm not shopping for anything until maybe March. As for what you can get: when the time comes friends and family will get the registry, get whatever your heart desires.

8) Are you having a shower?
Not a traditional shower. We do not want to sit in a room full of people opening gifts while you watch. We are throwing ourselves a co-ed party, with music and dancing, and no gift opening. I put it out there now so that there are no surprises.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Post Thanksgiving Wrap Up

Gobble gobble everybody!
I needed a few days to cool down after Turkey Day. Not that it was a traumatic holiday, but I just needed a few days in between to relax. There was a lot of food, and I managed to eat some without getting sick. Exception: my mom's stuffing. She thinks she's being slick by putting beef sausage or pork sausage in the stuffing. Like that's gonna hide the chunks of giblets she "snuck" in there. Nice try, lady!

Anyhoo- I did not overeat, but I was made to wait for food, which would have annoyed me even if I was not pregnant. My grandmother - mother to the giblet pusher - has me trained. If she says dinner's at 2, I'm at the table at 2, and when she says get the hell out at 7, my coat is on and I'm out the door.

So, pregnant ladies, if you know you're going to a friend's house and she says lunch is at 12, carry a snack, just in case lunch hits the table a few hours late. You need to eat, you're taking care of yourself and the growing fetus. My mom tried to wait for my sister's fiance and his family to arrive, but when 4pm came we said grace and got to grubbin'. 3pm means 3pm!

Speaking of Thanksgiving, I had the opportunity to indulge in things the pregnancy police get antsy about: sugar and red wine. I made vanilla custard ice cream and Church Punch for my mom's dinner. What's Church Punch, you ask? Anyone who went to a church with a largely African American congregation may know what I'm talking about. Powered fruit punch made according to instructions, with ginger ale and fresh squeezed lemons for that extra kick. It's sugary goodness, and I drank a lot of it on Thursday!

I also had red wine with dinner Saturday. My father in law grabbed my glass as he said "I assume you won't be having any of this." WRONG! It's the second trimester, and I am cleared for takeoff! I've had a total of 1 and a half glasses of wine since I hit this glorious milestone. The first half a glass was at a friend's birthday dinner. The second half was at my husband's grandparents house, and the third half on Saturday. I even sat at a dinner table with a huge bottle of red and had absolutely none of it. Why? Because I have self-control. Not only do I enjoy my half glass of vino when I choose to imbibe, but I wait until I've eaten what's on my plate before I do. Holy crap, I'm a responsible adult!

I have a friend who drank a can of cola a day because she wanted it. Two month old baby and his mother are alive and healthy. I drink a cup of caffeinated tea in the morning, and sometimes a cup of coffee in the afternoon. BBQ potato chips and I were great friends for a few days. But I'm quick to eat some fruit, yogurt, whole grain cereals, and for a while my husband fed me nothing but vegetables for dinner.

The moral of this Thanksgiving tale: People will scrutinize every move you make when you are with child. Your body becomes public property, and people will police every cup and morsel you put to your mouth. As long as you and your doctor know you are not harming your child, I think you're fine. All things in moderation, and don't beat yourself up about the "bad" stuff. Develop the better eating habits so the not so good ones won't be so detrimental. You're pregnant, but you're still a human being for God's sake (I say, as I sip my orange and cranberry juice).

Maybe I'll go steam some edamame and baby carrots for a snack...
See, nobody's around when you do the good stuff, are they?:-D

Friday, November 16, 2007

Full Disclosure, Again (not for everyone)

If you're not interested, just scroll down to the "17 weeks, 3 days" post. I will be talking about things that definitely fall into the "too much info" category. However, I made a promise to share, and share I must.

Seriously, I don't want to hear one word about how you didnt need to know that. I could give two shits, especially when I warned you not to read it! That's what you get, and you'll get neither sympathy nor an apology from me.

Are they gone?

Girls, three things are happening that are a little annoying.
1) My crotch hurts. It feels like I've pulled the muscles where your labia meets the thigh. It started a few weeks ago, and maybe this will not happen to you. Hopefully it won't. But it's annoying as hell, especially when I'm getting in and out of bed. I'm not sure if it's because my center of gravity has changed and I'm having difficulty turning in bed, or even getting out of bed. But whatever it is, I don't like it.

2) My crotch smells funny. Not like fish funny, or dirty, just different. This phenomenon I was warned about in the pregnancy books, but I didn't believe it. There's nothing I can do about it, and I hope no one notices this but me. I haven't noticed the discharge the books said may or may not accompany this.

3) My nipples are hurting. Not the whole boob, just the nipples.
Again, I was warned, but I was hoping it wouldn't happen. It's not so bad that I have to wear a bra to sleep. I do have to be careful when I put it on or take it off though. Oh- I'm a cup size larger WOO HOO!!!

The things no one will tell you, until you get pregnant Why is this stuff a secret anyway? It'll help you feel more normal, I say. But what the hell do I know, I've never done this.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

17 weeks, 3 days

That's how pregnant I am. Isn't science amazing?
(11/16/07 I forgot to say yesterday that the heartbeat is strong, 160 beats per minute.)

The doc took blood to screen or test for spina bifida. I won't have to give blood again for two and a half months. She also says I'm not gaining as much weight as she'd like but she's not worried about it yet. Neither am I frankly, I figure I'm doing all I can not to get sickyface all over the place, so as long as I'm keeping what I eat down, I'll be fine. I also move around a lot, either walking to and from the train station, taking the stairs at work, maybe that has something to do with it. Fear not, I am not starving myself or the little fetus.

These doctor visits are quick, which is rather annoying. It's like being in a drive-through, for God's sake. Not really, the office visit is ten minutes, and I don't think people sit in the drive-through for that long, unless you go to the drive-through of the McDonald's in my old neighborhood.

Oh- I had a freakout last night. I've been watching A Baby Story and Bringing Home Baby as a part of my morning breakfast routine, no big deal. I've seen hundreds of births on these shows, and even an anthropological movie showing everything without hurling. Last night's episode of Private Practice on ABC scared the crap out of me. Women are screaming, a doctor had to reach in and turn a breech baby, women are screaming, in between doctor's proposition each other in the hallway, of course. I started bawling "Oh my God, I can't do this!" Completely irrational response, especially since I can watch these births on TLC without batting an eye, even before I got knocked up (I like using that phrase. It tickles me!)

The moral of the story: Network TV likes to strike fear in the hearts of women and call it entertainment or quality story-telling. If you want to see what births are like, watch TLC.

Other than that, the nausea continues, my fight with water wages on...

People keep asking how my husband is doing and whether I'm driving him crazy yet. He's tired from commuting to another state for work, then coming home and doing chores, because I am either tired, in bed with a heating pad on my back, or in class. So no, I do not pull the "I'm craving jelly doughnuts from the Dunkin Donuts on the West side of Baltimore at 2:30 AM" card, because he's doing a tremendous amount of work for the both of us. I can get up and eat a bowl of instant maple and brown sugar oatmeal, which I often do.

So, "Big Up!" to the father of our child, never ever to be referred to as my baby's daddy (I had to correct a guy a few times about that)

Thursday, November 8, 2007


So, how am I doing?
It's hard to say. I thought I was over my repulsion to the Reading Terminal Market last week. I walked in with my boss and another co-worker and sat at the counter with them. When I got back to work I was feeling pretty full. I ate a bagel with mozzerella and tomato, drank a strawberry cantaloupe banana juice with a shot of wheatgress, and had half a wonton soup. This may have been too much, because I got sickyface (that's my euphemism for puking. Sickyface sounds better, doesn't it!)
So no more overeating...

My back was hurting a lot last week. The pain is less now, but I've discovered while at work that if I sit for long enough, my coxsix hurts. My right boob is itching (I do wash, thank you!), and my hands are getting drier faster. Oh- I forgot to tell you ladies, when you are early in your pregnancy your boobs hurt 24/7. Mine hurt so bad I had to sleep in tank shirts. Full disclosure.

Anyhoo, I'm not as tired as I was two weeks ago, but am still taking it slow, and I enjoy my 12-hour Saturday naps. How do I know they're so long? My personal timekeeper (aka my husband) tells me so. Do I care? Clearly not, since I continue to take said naps :-)

Now more of the co-workers are asking how I'm doing, asking am I pregnant, should I be doing that in my condition? So I answer their questions because it's just easier than telling the vast majority what they can kiss. The "in your condition" phrase is getting old, fast. I'm not going to do anything to harm either of us. To be really crass (albeit appropriate since I work in an African American cultural institution) if women on the plantations worked until labor kicked in, I think I can handle wrapping a doll and putting it in a box.

So get ready for lots of patronizing when you get pregnant. Suddenly you become weak and stupid.

And I think I will have to start walking around with a pencil to physically remove people's hands from my stomach.

More later...

Thursday, November 1, 2007

The Pregnant Woman's Miracle Cure(s)

I can't take credit for the title this time. My husband came up with it.

Because neither of us were particularly interested in doing work, we chatted on gmail for most of the day. (This is not unusual, FYI) I came in to work around 10pm today, which is usually when I'm waking up and microwaving water for my oatmeal. So now it's 5:00pm, and I am exhausted. I usually don't feel like I need a nap, but between waking up at 4am, getting back to sleep at 6am, then jumping out of bed at 9am, I am beat.

The worst part is that I can't nap. I would love to have a curtain on my corner cube, so I could close it, crawl under the desk and sleep. But alas, no. Nor can I just go home and sleep because I have a scene study class from 7-9, and I'm rehearsing with my partner in 20 minutes! I'm tired, my back has been hurting since Sunday, I'm just miserable all around.

Sleep as much as you can, and buy a heating pad. Both will serve you well during pregnancy. *Yawn*