Friday, February 20, 2009

Mommy Abuse?

Tallulah bit my leg so hard on Tuesday morning she broke the skin. I now have two little puncture wounds to the left of my knee cap. I reported her to the local authorities. An officer came to take a report, but took one look at Tallulah and refused to believe someone so adorable could commit such a heinous act. The officer then asked Tallulah if she wanted to press charges against me for making a false statement. Tallulah shook her head no (one of many new tricks she's learning), smiled and waved bye to the officer. Then she scratched my neck as a warning.

I was nursing her before her nap on the same day. My nephew (who is visiting us from NYC for the week) sat by me on the couch, and brushed Tallulah's head. Five seconds later she realized what happened and started crying. She bit my nipple, turned and bit my arm. When I moved her to my shoulder, she bit that, too. My nephew woke her, but I get attacked? That's bullshit!

I quit my job to care for her. I used to get up in the middle of the night to feed her. I even suck the snot out of her little nose to clear it, because she refuses to let me use the aspirator on her. And this is the thanks I get? I'm on edge, I tell ya. I never know when she's gonna strike, and it's so distressing. I really do feel like I'm being abused. I know she's just a baby, but I can't help but feel like she's doing this on purpose. How do I stop the biting?

Friday, February 13, 2009

Can't Sleep? Post on the blog!

It's 1:13 am. I am exhausted, but I feel like I should post an entry. Tallu's cutting another tooth on the top row. The top two aren't completely down and she's starting with another one! I've given up on the teething tablets, mainly because I like the extended relief of ibuprofen. I feel badly that she's suffering, but I'm so glad she will have no recollection of this experience.
The good news is Tallu's making good use of her teeth. Wednesday she bit my nipple, my bottom lip, my cheek, and my left shoulder. I'm becoming more observant during her nursing sessions, watching to see when she's finished eating so that I don't become her chew toy. Baby teeth are like jagged razors, and the jaw strength is superhuman. This will sound crazy, but I think I'm afraid of her!

More good news is that she's eating solid foods, and she's less messy about it. We've added yogurt to the menu. The consistency took some getting used to, but Tallu definitely likes it! I get a whole milk yogurt. Last week's flavors were blueberry and apple, and tonight she ate pear. The serving size is one container, but she never eats a whole one. I'm trying not to feed her too much yogurt at dinner, because I want her to have her warm milk before bed. I'm frightened of Razormouth, but I'm still required to nourish her. A friend asked if I was still planning to nurse her for a year. I have a month and a half to go (can you believe it?), so I don't want to quit now. I'm not sure how long I want to go after that. I'm glad that she's better with solid foods, though I must admit the only time I give her a meal is dinner, some Cheerios if she gets whiny between nursings, or Zwieback toast, or some prunes.

Lastly, when it comes to food, the girl knows what she doesn't want. I handed her a prune today. She threw it on the ground. So we walked to the kitchen, and I grabbed the box of Zwieback. Tallu and I reached into the box at the same time. She ate her toast, and I ate her prune.

It's 2:11 am. Wake-up time has been about 6:45 the past two mornings, so I should get to sleep.

Friday, February 6, 2009

A Fair Trade

We've been looking for a house for about a year. Shortly after New Year's we looked at a house in the East Mount Airy section of Philadelphia. It was everything we wanted: a fixer-up that's not in condemnable shape, close to public transportation and near the downtown area we like, and affordable. We knew we'd be foolish to let this house go to someone else, so we put in an offer, cheesy note about how much we loved the place included. That was on a Monday.

On Tuesday our realtor called to say the other party's realtor wanted to know if we were amending our offer. This house was at the high end of our range, and to amend our offer was pushing us to the max. Then Tim asked me the following question: "If I put in a higher offer, would you be willing to go back to work for us to afford this?"

I've been an apartment dweller my whole life, and no my parents didn't own the one where I lived as a child. I love being home with Tallu overall, and wouldn't trade this time for anything. But I'm so tired of dealing with landlords, of the impermance of apartment living. I'd love for Tallu to live in a house, with stairs, and a dog, and a backyard. So I thought for a moment and said, "Yes." We amended our offer, and hoped for the best.

That night the realtor called to say congratulations! We've done the home inspection, been approved for a mortgage, and the closing is February 26. My husband can't swing a mortgage on top of our other bills alone. I've enjoyed being at home with Tallu, but part of being a good parent is doing what's best for your family. My going back to a job that pays is what's best for all of us right now.

Thursday, February 5, 2009


Tallu is becoming a bit more independent. She has figured out how to sit up from laying down, she crawls backwards, and she scoots on her butt to move forward. Tallu is also very flexible, like most babies, and will stretch her little arm and fingers to get what she needs if she doesn't feel like scooting to what she wants. I'd like to thank our living room for the sudden burst of mobility. I moved back the futon and coffee table, creating more floor space. There is no carpet in there, so I laid out some blankets. Tallu travels all over the living room, and I purposely stay on the furniture as much as I can. This way she has plenty of room to move, and I don't get tempted to reposition her or push a toy back when it rolls just out of reach. Plus it cuts back on biting- if the boobs are on the other side of the room, there's no temptation to have a nip, and then a chomp.

I did not look up the crawling business, thanks to motherly wisdom. Why upset myself, right? Tallu will do what she needs to do when she's ready, like she did with sleeping in the crib.

Words of Wisdom

Last night, after putting Tallu to bed, my husband returned to the bedroom with an epiphany: "Fuck that cry it out shit!"

Most eloquent. And true.